I had 5 weeks of amazing help – Ua’s sister for the week just before the birth, my mom for three weeks after, and my mother-in-law for that fourth week postpartum.  (Not to mention the friends who’ve stopped by with meals, hugs, the occasional shoulder to cry on, or to pick up D for a play date.)  I’m not sure if I’m lucky, spoiled, or what, but I certainly feel loved!

So this was my first week flying solo with a 4 week old and 4 year old.  How are we doing, you ask?  Actually, we’re doing okay!  Maybe in part because A is still a relatively mellow, sleepy little guy; in part because I’ve done this before and I’m just more relaxed; in part because I’ve set my standards pretty low  At the end of the day, if everyone is alive, fed and I’ve managed (mostly) to keep my voice down, I’m counting it as a win!  Anything on top of that is bonus points.  (OK, I still hope for bonus points most days – cooking something, going somewhere, doing something extra fun, playful or stimulating with D – but I know it won’t always be possible.)

My secret weapon that has been keeping the days basically flowing (though babyhood being what it is, it could all change tomorrow and certainly will before long) – a morning jumpstart.  We wake up with Ua and the birds to make sure I have time and hands free to get a few energizing essentials done before he leaves at 7a for work.  With D the essentials were simply getting dressed and a cup of coffee to enjoy sans baby, so I was ready to head out on a walk at the same time Ua left.  With A the essentials are everyone getting dressed, the dishes being put away and a load of laundry started.  Once all that’s done, I feel good about my space and ready to get out and about, whether it’s meeting a friend or just hanging laundry and playing in the backyard.  I feel a little ahead on my tasks, and since the moments where I get to put A down and have both hands free still feel short and few, I’ve been trying to keep that going through the rest of the day – getting lunch ready when I have a moment at 10:30 so I’m not stressed later when A needs to nurse just as D announces she’s starving, etc., etc.  I think it’s helping to minimize tears (mine included).

So am I exhausted by day’s end?  Absolutely.  Do I count down the minutes until Ua’s arrival home?  Yes.  (I’m even finding myself waiting for him outside with the kids during that last half hour, just like I did with D – lest that sound too pitiful, that’s at least 50% about just needing the change of scene and fresh air to re-energize us on the home stretch!)  But I know it’s just a season, and really – a short one.  I’m grateful, and we’re making it.

Thanks for coming back! As always, I'd love to hear your thoughts.

Tags: a's first year
Filed under: Family Life, self management

I’ve realized I’m going to have to work on this birth story in pieces or it will never get written! And tomorrow is day 14, so it feels about time!

‘Ua’s sister was with us all through that last week, hoping to help with D during A’s birth. It was awesome having her company, esp. as ‘Ua had just started the school year and I’d started maternity leave. As Saturday rolled around, and my mother-in-law was coming to take her back to the airport, I could tell my body was gearing up – A had moved even lower and some other signs. I was so bummed she’d have to leave without meeting baby, but I couldn’t imagine my body really releasing into labor while my living room was full of family! All through the day, as we went about normal life (plus making sure all the birth supplies were ready), I could sense this building tension. Given how intense things were later, ‘Ua compares it to a spring being wound up as tightly as it can.

We said goodbye to the family around 3:30, and then I had a few last minute nesting requests, like vacuuming, before we went out for ice cream together. I was pretty sure it would be our final fun memory as a family of three! By 5ish, I was having contractions every 10-12 minutes or so, mild ones, not strengthening yet. I wanted some time alone, so we explained to D that labor might be starting and she and Daddy would be a team the rest of the night. She was thrilled! I spent a few hours relaxing through contractions in bed – they stayed mild and far apart, so I rested and conserved energy. Continue reading ›

Tags: baby, home birth
Filed under: Family Life

D is such a natural little persuader. We shouldn’t be surprised by it anymore, but it still takes us off guard and cracks us up!

* “You know, guys, i think we make a really good team… We make such a good team, I think we would do a great job throwing a party together” (one she’d been lobbying unsuccessfully for for days).
* “Mommy, you knows what’s really good for pregnant women – fresh air!” (as she’s being shepherded out to the backyard by ‘Ua to give me a little quiet).

She’s got some leadership skills, no doubt about that. ‘Ua’s theory, after watching D try to get in on the action of directing and organizing participants in a recent service weekend I led, is that she’s doing her best to imitate Mommy. While I love the idea that I can model for her like that, I really don’t think I was so persuasive as a child – I was more blunt and have mellowed with age . This child is her own little, amazing self. Can’t wait to see her take on her new big sister role someday soon!

Filed under: Family Life

36 weeks tomorrow! 100% exhausted tonight. Today…

- we had our home visit with the midwife, so the approaching birthday is feeling more and more real!
- D made me a beautiful card & told me in multiple ways how excited she is that “our son” will be born soon
- I lost my belly button, which NEVER happened with D.
- I worked a lot, but am still not sure how I’m going to get it all wrapped up by 38 weeks! Nevertheless, I’m feeling more and more certain that’s a good goal.

I’m happy, healthy, but very tired.

Tags: pregnancy
Filed under: Family Life

Isn’t every day Crazy Hair Day?  It is in this home!  But today we made an extra-special EFFORT to go extra-SPECIAL crazy for VBS

This year has been D’s first at Vacation Bible School, and though she is a little younger than the other kids in her class, she’s having a blast.  I’m surprised by how nostalgic it has made me feel for my own VBS days!  I’m there each day for worship at beginning and end, and listening to, singing along, dancing to all those songs – some of which I am learning for the first time! – it is really sweet to think that these are going to be her nostalgic VBS memories.

One cute, funny moment from the week – I have a short teaching section every morning right after the opening worship ends, where I go up on the platform to present a little nugget about global water needs and encourage the kids to give toward water-related development for the Afar, an unreached, nomadic people group in the deserts of Ethiopia.  The first day, I specifically asked for a 3rd or 4th grade helper.  The second day, I had an adult helper lined up ahead of time, and tried to cue her that I was ready by calling out for “my assistant.”  Of course, D popped up immediately from where she was sitting in the front row to run up on stage.  And yes, normally that is her role!  So we worked her in   The child has no timidity – 200 people, no problem!  She absolutely loves the spotlight.

Tags: funny, Spirituality
Filed under: Family Life